


A Little Too Much

by Softrockandshowtunesgirlscout22



Category: Madam Secretary
Genre: AU, F/M, Family, Family Fluff, McCord family feels
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-28
Updated: 2020-10-05
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:20:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,797
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26705884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Softrockandshowtunesgirlscout22/pseuds/Softrockandshowtunesgirlscout22
Summary: When an unexpected surprise shakes up her family completely, Elizabeth considers resigning from her role as Secretary of State, until she's reminded by the people she's closest to, just how good she's at what she does.
Relationships: Alison McCord & Stevie McCord, Elizabeth McCord & Jason McCord, Elizabeth McCord & Stevie McCord, Elizabeth McCord/Henry McCord
Kudos: 7





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Yikes, I've been binge watching Madam Secretary since it's on Netflix and this wouldn't leave me alone. I'm only in season 3 so bear with me guys. Also, the McCords have already gone through this once before, shortly after Elizabeth's 40th birthday. (A few years before she took on the job of Secretary of State) Kind of a side story sequel to my other Madam Secretary No Love Without Sacrifice although it kind be a stand alone. For the purpose of the story, Bess is a little younger than she is in the show.
> 
> This is not beta'd so I apologize for any mistakes you might find. I own nothing.

Elizabeth McCord was good at multitasking. Balancing her job, her marriage and children, almost worked out. Almost. Today she wished it would. It was the twins’s 5th birthday and she wouldn't be able to forgive herself if everything didn't run smoothly.

Bess couldn't believe her babies were 5, a year before when she had taken the role of Secretary of State for Conrad, they had celebrated the twins's birthday before moving to DC and now, a year after, Elizabeth found herself in a rather unexpected situation. She was 3 months pregnant with her 6tth child and she was nearing 45. It was scary as hell on both fronts, because of her age and her role in Conrad's presidency, hell, even when she was working at the CIA and the kids were small, she hadn't been this worried about just how dispensable she was on the job. But now, she wasn't so sure, the Dalton Administration was about to go into an election year.

Talk about timing.

Elizabeth watched as people began to gather, the people she cared about the most, her kids, friends, and staff. Henry had been outnumbered by both Jason and Nicky as they played laffy strings. A McCord family tradition.

"Mom? Are you okay?" Ali had asked, coming to stand beside her. The farm had been the perfect place to throw the party, the kids could use the fresh air and she needed it too. To leave the city and just remind herself of an old life that seemed to have happened long ago. 

"I'm fine Noodle, just taking a minute. You?"

"Yeah, me too, it was a great idea to have the party here."

"Wasn’t it? And those two look so happy." Elizabeth pointed out. 3 years ago, she didn't think she'd see the day Nicky would be able to wrestle with Henry and Jason. It seemed that Cancer was nothing more than just a nightmare she'd woken up from and her baby had lived through it.

They all had.

"Okay, who wants cake?" Stevie called as she came out of the house with an enormous cake, one side was made specifically to Nicky's request and the other to Hannah's. Those two couldn't be more different and yet were so much alike.

"I better go help." Ali said, giving Elizabeth's arm a light squeeze.

"Babe?" It was Henry, he hadn't completely survived the laffy atack and was brushing off the reminders. "What are you doing over here all by yourself?"

"Just thinking."

"About?"

"What I'm going to tell Conrad Monday morning." Elizabeth said. Henry leaned back on the fence beside her. "And if I should be handing in my resignation."

"What? You said that wasn't even on the table."

"No, it is. I just don't want it to be."

Henry sighed. "You've done this before you know? The whole being pregnant and having a job thing."

"Yeah, but I didn't have a high risk pregnancy back then and when I was pregnant with the twins I was a Political Science professor. All the danger I got into was having a student debate me on foreign policies. Now I have diplomats and dictators wanting to prove a point."

"Yeah, I know."

"Plus, I won't be able to do much traveling. And that's basically half of my job description."

"I'm sure you could figure it out." Henry said quickly.

"I know." Elizabeth smiled at her husband. 3 months ago, when they had found out about the baby, they had wanted to surpass the 12 week mark before being sure the baby was healthy, they didn't even tell the kids right away. "I'll talk to Conrad, see where it goes."

"Sounds like a plan, and you know that whatever happens, I'm here, right?"

"I do, thanks babe." Henry offered her a sweet kiss and his hand as they joined the kids in singing Happy Birthday.

Elizabeth knew what she had to do, but that didn't mean it was going to be easy.

* * *

That night, she found herself in the twins's room. That's where Henry found her.

"They had a good birthday..." Elizabeth said leaning back to rest her weight against Henry’s chest. 

"The best and they'll remember it too, which is good."

"And if they don't, I think Alison took pictures to last them a lifetime." Elizabeth whispered.

"Yes well, if she wants to become a children's designer, what better models than her little brother and sister?"

Elizabeth sighed. "She'll be gone in two years time. Can you believe it?"

"Yes and we'll still have 16 more years to look forward to with this baby." Henry wrapped his arms around her stomach. "Thank God it's just one kid this time."

"Shut up. Don't even say it." Elizabeth said in all seriousness. "I love our children all the same, no matter what but it would have been nice to be able to retire early and now we'll be sending 3 more to college."

"I should have done the vasectomy the first time around."

"Yeah, but we didn't think it could happen twice."

"And yet we were wrong." Henry had began caressing her not very prominent baby bump absentmindedly.

"So wrong..." Elizabeth laughed quietly and then there was a dread beat silence. "Babe?"

"Yeah?"

"I still don't know what I'm going to do about all this."

* * *

During the Monday morning briefing, Elizabeth found herself in front of Conrad Dalton, her former mentor, boss and of course the President of the United States. "Sir, I was wondering if you might have a few minutes to discuss something off the record?"

Conrad looked at her, thankfully Russell had gone into a meeting and he wasn't there to just implode at her news, because of course, he would.

"Of course Bess. What is it?" She could sense worry in his voice, after all, he was her old friend and he cared deeply for her.

"I am sorry I waited this long to make you aware sir, but Henry and I didn't want to take any chances..." Conrad gave her a puzzled look. "I'm pregnant."


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much to everyone reading. I’m excited to be getting back to writing the McCords since I love them so much. Just to establish a timeline, the story is set up somewhere in season two.  
> Some bits will be taken from actual eps to set up the timeline of events but remember this is an AU. Henry's story with Dimitri happened, except he wasn't kidnapped but was placed in witness protection sooner, which means he and Stevie also meet sooner and in different circumstances. You'll see!

For as long as Henry could remember, mornings at the McCord household had been chaotic. If Henry was being honest, everyday, he was wrapped in some kind of caos good or bad. Whether it came from their gown daughter, teengagers or toddlers. Elizabeth had come home rather late from work the day before, the day she had admitted to her boss of being 3 months pregnant and they hadn't really gotten a chance to talk about it. And they couldn't either this morning because as always, they had too much on their hands at the moment.

Everyone was talking at the same time, Jason and Ali had been arguing about school and Stevie was making some point of the US position on the Russia situation. It wasn't until Henry heard Alison calling for him that he actually was able to zoom out. "So Dad, can you drop me off? I want to get to school early to work on my column." Oh yeah, Ali, her ever imaginative middle child mind had taken wind since she had been writing on the school's paper.

"Of course." Henry said with a smile as he poured coffee into a travel mug. Then they heard Elizabeth and the twins making their way down "No, sweetheart, it still be a few weeks before we can see Buttercup. I'm setting it up with Mitch soon I promise." Elizabeth was telling Hannah who had insisted wanting to see the horses soon since they had not been around for her birthday. "It will be a belated family outing, for which I am committing everyone to go!" She said. Stevie and Henry shared a look. "Please?"

"Okay, what's a few weeks?"

"Like maybe two weekends from now? That's what Mitch said."

"Fine, I'm in." Stevie said. "As long as they are." She turned to Jason and Alison.

"I guess I can move my schedule around." Ali said, earning a frown from her Mom.

"And I'm okay with it if it's just for the weekend." Jason pointed out. Of course, it was only for the weekend, Elizabeth was yet to be fired from her job. Not that Henry knew exactly what she and Conrad had discussed. Henry turned to look at his watch as he saw the twins eat their breakfast as quickly as they could so everyone would be to school on time. "Listen babe, I thought we could have lunch today?" Bess said as Henry was almost out the door.

"Sure, count me in. I'll see you later then. Love you."

"Love you too."

Elizabeth kept staring at the clock. By now, her entire staff knew about her pregnancy so she was not anxious about that part, but about talking to Henry about the prospect of resigning, not because of Conrad, no, he had been incredibly supportive of the situation, unlike Russell, who had seemed to be fuming and looked at her as if she was a 16 year old and unmarried child. It was then that she thought that maybe in a way, she did feel that way about this pregnancy, she was making something of herself, changing the world and she couldn't possibly not feel like she was failing in both fronts, she had had 12 weeks to feel bad about it, on how she felt guilty about getting pregnant in the brink of an upcoming election year. Or that she felt bad about feeling guilty. She didn't love this baby any less than her other babies. In fact, all the opposite, she felt like she appreciated her children even more so after getting this job.

"Ma'm, I'm sorry to disturb you." Came Blake's voice. "Dr. McCord is here."

"Thanks Blake, hold off my non urgent calls for an hour if possible please."

"Of course." Blake took a leave and in came Henry.

"Hey babe. How was your morning?"

"Uneventful, which is another way of saying, I feel a storm coming." Elizabeth said as they broke a quick kiss. "I ordered us a couple burgers and fries, hope that's okay. I just had this crazy craving…"

"More than okay, I love it when I get to share the cravings thing with you." Henry smiled, sitting on the couch in her office and helping her to take out the food.

"I respect Stevie and I love her for standing up for what she believes in, but man I wonder if she misses it." Elizabeth said, taking a bite of her burger. "So good…"

Henry laughed. He liked seeing her enjoying that part of her pregnancy, it was almost fun for him to figure out just what she would be asking from him when the next craving wave happened, not that she wasn't entirely capable of getting it herself.

"Okay, so now that we actually have a minute to talk." Henry said. "Are you going to tell me what happened yesterday?"

So she did, she told him about her talk with Dalton and then when she had told her staff, who were intuitive enough to have guessed even though she was not showing enough yet. And then he told him about Russell which made Henry laugh. "That guy, if it wasn't because I work for him, I'll give him a piece of my mind."

"He's harmless, plus Conrad said it was up to me to decide what I wanted to do, although he looked worried."

"Should he be?"

Elizabeth sighed. "I don't know. My job is still demanding and high risk, not to mention extremely stressful. Much like this pregnancy, and I can't seem to find middle ground between the two of them and it's not like I can take a leave of absence for six months."

"No, of course not, but you can work around it, we can make this happen babe, I'll help you in anyway I can and I'm sure the kids will too, I mean, Stevie does live with us still, if she sticks around long enough she can help us out and Ali is already the baby whisperer as for Jason and the twins, well, they'll adjust for sure."

"But then there's the subject of your job." Elizabeth said after a long silence.

"Yeah, I know, and I'll keep at it, on both fronts, as much as I can. Still, my commitment to our family will always come first."

"Same here, even if now I do have to answer to the entire country."

"Right, but the country doesn't get a say in this, I mean it didn't the last time we did this and it doesn't now."

"It's still my job Henry and I didn't have it then."

"True and you are so great at what you do, but you are also an amazing Mom, in spite of duty and it may be part of your legacy, but it doesn't define you babe."

"Oh, I like that. I'm just going to let that sink in to stop me from doing what I've been playing in my head for the last 24 hours." Her phone buzzed and she heard Blake knock on the door, which meant lunchtime was over and she had to get back to work.

* * *

Two weeks had passed, which meant that they'd be going to the Horse Farm that Friday. Excitement could barely be contained for her five year olds. Anything that didn't entail being cooped up in the house, they were always in for. "Okay, everyone has to be ready to leave in 10 minutes!" Elizabeth called the kids, her phone was buzzing in her jacket's pocket and she prayed for it not be work.

"Hey Mitch, what's up?" She held the phone to her ear as she paid attention to the farm's caretaker. She heard the kids climb down the stairs, small boots, big boots. "Oh okay, yeah, we'll be there in time to see the Vet, right, see you soon, thanks." Henry gave her a look as he'd come down in time to listen to the last bit of the conversation.

"Everything okay?"

"I'm not sure, Mitch went to the Winter Stables to get the horses ready for transport and Buttercup was limping." Elizabeth said.

"A sprain?" Her husband replied.

"Probably, we're seeing the vet later today just to be sure." She said, it was evident by her tone of voice that she feared it would be worse than it sounded.

By the time they made it to the farm, it was getting dark since they had decided not to pull the kids out of the school for more than half a day, Mitch was already there to meet them with the vet. "Stevie, why don't you kids get inside, Dad and I will be right in." Her tone indicated Stevie she didn't want to be questioned so she just led her siblings inside as she and Henry greeted both Mitch and the vet and headed over to the Stables to check on Buttercup.

* * *

Cancer. It was like no matter how hard they tried, the damn disease seemed to follow them, of course it was different, this time, but Buttercup was such an important part of their lives, of their family and if they were being honest, this brought back memories of being in the Children's Ward at the hospital just waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Nicky of course had check ups every six months and by all means he was in remission but there weren't any guarantees. "Isn't there something we could try?" Henry said when the doctor had assessed the horse. "Radiation?"

"Honestly, he's in pain…" The vet admitted, her tone gathered sincerity and sadness.

"We can't have that." Bess said, caressing her horse tenderly. "When do we need to do this?"

"When you are ready."

"We have to tell the kids, but I don't want them here when it happens." Henry said.

"Then we'll just tell them he's sick and that he needs a lot of love from all of us and we'll do it Sunday, I'll tell Oliver and Andy to take them all home. I hope he agrees." Elizabeth said, as if he was agreeing, Buttercup placed his nose under her hand.

"Okay then, I'll come and check on him tomorrow and we can do it Sunday night." The vet agreed.

Elizabeth and Henry walked up to the house quietly, even though they knew they would have to put on a brave face for the kids as soon as they entered the house.

"Hey guys, come in, I'm making hot cocoa."

"Oh, that sounds so good honey. Are the twins in their PJ's?"

"Yep, Ali is getting them ready. Is everything okay with Buttercup?" This was Stevie, if they could tell someone, she was old enough to be able to understand. "Tumors? And there's nothing to be done?" She asked when her mother had finished explaining.

"The doctor said they can keep him comfortable but it's metastasized to his liver so there's little to be done." Henry said. "We're not saying anything yet to anyone."

"Are you guys okay?" She asked worriedly, she knew how special Buttercup was to her Mom and Dad.

"Barely, but we will." Elizabeth smiled softly. Buttercup had been an anniversary gift from Henry 10 years before. Her husband was right, he was family.

* * *

Elizabeth and Henry made the hard decision to explain to the twins about their beloved Buttercup, the farm had other horses, equally cherished by the children, but this was a hard pill to swallow nonetheless.

They didn't go into much detail, only explaining that he was sick. "Is he going to get better?" Hannah asked, the little girl was sitting on her parent's bed, her brother beside her, her Mom and Dad, holding each of them close. Bess looked at Henry.

"Well sweetheart, the thing is, he's in a lot of pain and even though the doctor will try her best…"

"We're just.." Bess tried, but then she stopped herself, she was about to tell her they didn't know what would happen but they did know and lying was not something they would felt okays about doing. No matter how old they were, specially not on something like this.

"If he dies…" Nicky said what his parents were afraid to."Will he go to heaven?"

"Oh, of course buddy, are you kidding? He's the best horse, he's got a cozy spot just for him when the time comes."

"When will it come?" Hannah asked

"We're not sure honey, but soon."

"Will we see him again?"

"I... I don't think we'll be able to sweetheart, no."

They were neither confirming nor denying he'd die, but better gave the children the opportunity to come to their own terms about it.

That night though, the twins asked if they could spend more time with Buttercup. Elizabeth knew that her son probably didn't remember much of his time in the hospital, but he spent most of his time surrounded by friends, family, little kids that were going through the exact same thing. It had helped him keep his spirits up and if it had meant so much to her and Henry, and even Nicky back then, it would definitely make Buttercup feel so loved.

So Henry and Bess bundled up the twins, carried some blankets and went into the stables where they set up a sort of camp.

Soon enough, Ali joined in, with a nice pot of hot chocolate and so did Stevie, a few minutes later, and to the surprise of everyone, even Jason joined in.

"This is nice huh?" Elizabeth said, hugging Hannah closer to her. Her free hand reaching out to pet Buttercup as he'd laid down by now.

"Yeah, it is." Henry agreed with a smile. Stevie gave their parents a knowing look.

About two hours later, the little ones were asleep and after tucking them in, Elizabeth allowed herself to be held by Henry, and finally cry.

After that first wave washed over her, she took in Henry's scent as he wrapped his arms around her. "Did we make the right choice about the kids? Telling them about Buttercup?"

"You'd rather they didn't know and we just told them next time we came that he went away somewhere?"

"The twins would take it…" She said, them gave it another thought. "At first."

"Children understand more than we give them credit for." Henry said. "At least this way, they have a chance to say goodbye."

"Yeah. that's what I'm dreading."

The next morning after they all had breakfast, they went to check on Buttercup again. "He seems sad Mommy." Hannah said.

"Maybe he'll miss us." Nicky put in. "We will too. A lot." He said in a matter of factly which made his siblings and parents smile.

"Yeah, we will miss him for sure, but we don't want him to be in pain do we?" Henry said, in his professor tone.

"No, we can't have that." Stevie patted the horse softly on the nose. Elizabeth and Henry stared at her. People were right, Henry was the Stevie Whisperer because he was the Elizabeth whisperer.

When it was time to go home, they decided to send the kids back on the motorcade. Tears had been shed and goodbyes had been said. Henry had been right about the twins, they seemed to be at peace with coming to terms that Buttercup was sick and even though Mitch and the vet had said to do their best for him, unfortunately that didn't mean they could save him.

Stevie had stayed behind with her parents as they waited. "The drug should take effect in about half an hour. Knowing you are here really is keeping him calm. To know that he is surrounded by the people that love him."

Stevie was cuddled up against Henry as Elizabeth had sat down beside her horse on the ground.

"I'm so glad you guys are here with me." She told her husband and daughter with a hoarse voice from keeping back the tears.

"No other place we'd rather be." Henry told her, reaching out to hold her free hand. Stevie nodded, cleaning the tears from her eyes.

"Dad's right Mom. Buttercup is family and we are his so it's only right. It's what he deserves." Elizabeth smiled. Her emotions were running high because of her pregnancy, the situation and of course the memories it brought.

3 years before, they had been sitting together in a hospital room, preparing for the worse.

_"If the transplant works. Nicky's survival rate goes up to 60%."_

_"And if it doesn't?"_

_"Then I would advise you to prepare yourselves for the worst."_

Little did they know, this would be only the beginning of them preparing for more than they had bargained for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you guys think? I really didn't like the fact Bess didn't have her kids with her when she lost Buttercup, so this is me making up for it, even though Henry is the most amazing husband, seriously.  
> Also, this is also a Stevie/Dimitri story per se. I just love those two!


End file.
